Friday's Letter

Dear Mr. Barron.  You have been working late nights for the past two weeks.  I am not a fan.  What I am a fan of is the sweet cuddles that I get when you finally climb into bed.  I am so glad that you are not too tired to show a girl some loving.  Dear Gina.  I love that your way of getting revenge to someone who is rude to you is by being considerable sweet back to them.  I saw you work this magic twice on two different occasions whilst in Wal-Mart.  Your kindness is so convincing even I thought you were being nice.  Only you would get revenge by being kind.  Dear Aiden.  You are hilarious.  Your sense of humor astounds me.  I'm pretty sure you get it from your mother.  Dear Egg Nog.  Your festive taste warms my heart.  Whether it is alone in a glass or added to my coffee in the morning, you are a welcomed guest in my home.  If only you weren't so fattening.  Dear Brett Joseph.  You. Are. Adorable.  I pointed out how you whine when you are considerably tired the other night and you continued to whine about how you do not whine.  So precious.  You can whine all you want, babe.  You work hard enough to deserve that privilege.  I love you more than I love cuddling!

The Missing Mother.

Now that Aiden has turned one, I have found myself looking back at pictures from the past year.  There are many, MANY pictures.  Each picture holds a special memory of that moment shared.  There is one thing that I noticed in all of these amazing pictures.  I am missing in many of them.  I see the pictures.  I remember the moment.  But I am not there in the picture.  "Where were you?", I asked myself.  Then it dawned on me.  I took these pictures.  There are several pictures of Aiden with many of our friends and family.  People that we love and adore more than anything.  Now, don't misunderstand me.  There are pictures of Aiden and I.  But these pictures are posed.  Many of them I had to ask someone, "Could you please take a picture of me with Aiden".  I spend everyday with my son.  I feed him, bathe him, play with him on the floor for hours at a time, sing to him, make funny faces and do silly dances to keep him from crying, take him to his doctor appointments, rock him to sleep, and change almost every diaper he has ever had.  I am always there with him.  Why are there not more pictures of us together?  Well, for one, it is usually just Aiden and I.  My husband works hard everyday and he's a man.  It's not like he thinks of taking pictures.  And to be honest, it is not like I would want him to.  I am most likely in a t-shirt, sweatpants, no make-up, hair tangled in a fallen bun.  Why would I want him to take pictures of me in that manner?  I guess when I saw that there weren't many candid pictures of Aiden and I, it upset me because I am always there.  I felt like Aiden would look back and wonder, "Where's mommy".  If you are a mother, you have most likely shared a familiar sentiment.  You are the one who captures those precious moments of your children.  Here's the thing.  It's okay to be missing out of these pictures.  Why?  Because you WERE there.   The entire time, you were the one in the moment.  If there is one thing that I have learned being a mother it is to enjoy the moments.  Even the bad ones when your baby is nonstop crying and you are working on little to no sleep.  These moments are not enjoyable.  Trust me, I know.  But they are moments to treasure because you were the one who was there to rock that sweet baby to sleep and let them know everything is okay.  Pictures fade.  And sometimes, pictures cause you to interrupt the moment.  I wish there were more candid pictures of Aiden and I, but I would not trade the moments that I had experienced for the sake of a picture.  If a picture is worth a thousand words, then a memory must be worth a lifetime.  There might not be a picture of the many times that Aiden and I went for strolls in the park, or the time that we fell asleep on the couch while watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse at 4am in the morning.  There isn't a picture of the time that I made Aiden laugh by doing this ridiculous dance in the kitchen.  But I have my memories.  These precious memories of our time spent together.  I remember my first night having to rock him in my brand new rocking chair.  I wasn't even angry or aggravated.  I was weirdly proud and excited to be the one that my baby needed to put him to sleep again.  I will never forget that night.  The picture is forever graved in my mind and carved in my heart.  So to you amazing, warrior like mothers.  Be encouraged.  You may be missing in many of your family photos, but you will forever be present in the lives of your children and in their hearts. 

This is one of my favorite pictures of Aiden and I.  We were posing for my husband to take a picture and my sweet sister snapped this picture with my phone without me knowing.  So I do in fact have a few "candid" pictures :)

A Look Back...continued!!

8 Months: 7 Months Old

You love to snuggle up with your "Lammy" that you got for Easter from your Gran Jules and G Daddy. 

I'm not sure why, but you take your best naps when you're cuddled up to your daddy.

This was taken on a rainy day where we did nothing but eat and cuddle all day.  One of mommy's favorite days ever!

You sure do love your bath times!

We were headed to see your Aunt Maya on this day.  You are looking dapper as always!

We had just gotten to the lake and you were still sleepy.  Your Uncle Jeff made a nice cushion:)

 9 Months: 8 Months Old

You were crawling like crazy this day and I was doing my best to get you to stop for a picture.  This is all you would give me:)

It's a tough life to be this handsome, but someone has to do it!

Sweet loving from your cousin Karmyn!

I guess it's time we lower your crib. 

Agh!  Where's my hand?

10 Months: 9 Months Old

I got this, MOM!

This is the face I get when you just wake up.

Shopping with your daddy.

Lunch date with your favorite Aunt Gina. 

You and the slide did not get along on this particular day. 

Your first taste of ice cream with Gammy.  I think you liked it!

You fell asleep while eating.  I couldn't resist taking a picture. 

You LOVE to swing!

You like riding around with your G Daddy. 

Shammah is literally your best friend.

You didn't want to take a picture.  I get it.  The rabbit is scary.  Whatever. 

Dinner at the Cheesecake factory with Karmyn and your GG.

Again, these face animal characters just weren't your thing.  Maybe next time, right?

11 Months: 10 Months Old

Getting some loving from your Grandma's

Trying out your Halloween costume. 

Getting some sweet kisses from the bride. 

Visiting Daddy at work. 

Touring the cookie factory.  We had to wear these hair nets.  You weren't too thrilled about it.

Knocked out after a walk in the park. 

Playing with your G Daddy. 

You love this pirate hat that your cousins from New Jersey sent you.  The Dina's always send the best gifts!

We are such hams!! 

Mommy loves your cheese grin!

PUMPKIN PATCH!! 

This is quite possibly one of my favorite pictures with you. 

I love your face!

You and daddy had fun in the bounce house.

This was a great day at the pumpkin patch. 

I'm guessing you thought it was your bottle?

Feeding the geese. 

Stink Face!

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine!

12 Months: 11 Months Old

Playing with your birthday present from your Grandma Sue. 

I'm not sure why you and daddy decided to lay on the sidewalk and play, but you two always have fun wherever you go. 

Bounce House with the most handsome son in the world. 

You love to facetime Daddy when he's at work!

You love the ball pit!

 

 

13 Months: 12 Months Old

 

Happy 1st Birthday my dear handsome man. 

Tie Dyed Birthday pancakes!

Shot's on your birthday :(

If you really "Mustache" I'm ONE!!

Birthday Picture with my Little Man!

Whew!  Shots are over with!

Wagon ride with Mommy and Daddy.

Talking to yourself in the mirror!