Happy (Day Before) Birthday, Aiden!

My precious Aiden.  Tomorrow is your birthday.  We have already had your birthday party, and for some reason I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that it has already been a year since you were born.  My heart is completely overwhelmed with emotions. 

This day, one year ago, I went to work for the last time.  Little did I know that it would be my last day because I was determined that I would be a working mother.  We lived in Mobile, AL and I worked at Lotus Boutique.  I loved my job and the people I worked with.  I had no plans of being a stay at home mother.  I worked until five that day and went home as I did everyday the days before.  My father and husband were at the house, and your daddy had the entire house decorated for Christmas and ready for your arrival.  My mother, your Gran, and my sister, your Aunt Gina, came soon after.  Brett left for work, Mama and Gina went to go get something to eat, and Daddy and I went to the hospital to check in sometime around 8:30.  It literally seems like yesterday.  I was so calm.  I brought the entire house with me to the hospital.  I had my laptop, a bag full of thank you cards that I needed to write (and never sent out...FAIL at being a southern lady), and several bags full of baby clothes that I wanted to dress you in.  I didn't sleep much that night.  The anxiety began to set in that you would be here tomorrow.  

I will be very honest with you.  I was nervous to be your mother.  I had no idea what I would do with a baby.  I didn't know anything about babies and I have never felt very motherly.  You came into this world at 1:33, December 6, 2011.  I remember bringing you home, and your father drove SO SLOW.  He was so scared to get on the road with you.  He said we had "precious cargo".  I could have never imagined my life the way it is now that you are here.  I never went back to work.  When you came into my life, I could not imagine not spending every second with you and having someone else watch you grow more than I.  I miss working, but I do not regret making the decision to stay home with you.  I am very grateful to God and your father for giving me this opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom. 

Aiden Hugh Barron.  You have taught me how to love unselfishly.  I have learned to treasure each moment given to me.  Through you, I have learned to not sweat the silly things and to hold on to the important things in life.  It is because of you that I have found a renewed purpose in life and a refreshing in my relationship with The Father.  Our God gives life and He takes it away.  I am so grateful that He gave you to our family.  I have watched you grow and my heart soars and breaks with every milestone.  You have been an overachiever from the very beginning.  You already have eight teeth, you are in size 4 diapers, and you wear 18 month clothes.  You are walking around the house like you have been doing it for years.  I am so grateful, but I wish sometimes that I could go back a year ago and hold my new baby in my arms. 

I have mentioned this several times in my blogs, but you were not planned.  I had plans of my own.  However, God saw it fit to give your father and I a gift in the form of a precious baby.  I secretly call you a miracle baby.  Dictionary.com defines miracle as the following: 1.an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause. 2. such an effect or event manifesting or considered as a work of God. 3. a wonder; marvel.  You, my precious son, are a wonder, an event that has surpassed all my human understanding and has changed my life for the better.  I can't imagine not being your mother.  I am so honored at this privilege.  Thank you.  Thank you for showing me that love is not about what you receive from others but what you give to others.  Thank you for showing me that God has a divine plan in the midst of all my silly planning.  Thank you for teaching me that I can be do things that I never imagined I could.  You are my inspiration and the reason why I try to be a better person everyday.  I pray that one day you look back at the type of mother I am to you and the wife that I am to your father and are proud.  May God's love and strength shine through me.  

You are my heart.  I love you, Aiden Hugh Barron.  Happy (Day Before) Birthday.